First to Fall Read online

  First to Fall (First to Fall #1)

  Title Page

  CHAPTER ONE

  CHAPTER TWO

  CHAPTER THREE

  CHAPTER FOUR

  CHAPTER FIVE

  CHAPTER SIX

  CHAPTER SEVEN

  CHAPTER EIGHT

  CHAPTER NINE

  CHAPTER TEN

  CHAPTER ELEVEN

  CHAPTER TWELVE

  CHAPTER THIRTEEN

  CHAPTER FOURTEEN

  About the Author

  FIRST TO FALL

  Farrah F. Polestico

  DEDICATION

  For all the girls who had their hearts

  broken before. May you

  find The One.

  EPIGRAM

  “You don’t love because: you love despite;

  not for the virtues, but

  despite the faults.”

  -William Faulkner

  CHAPTER ONE

  Georgina

  The keys made a clattering sound when I tossed them and they landed on the kitchen table. My neck and back was sore from hunching in front of the computer all day. I rubbed my tired eyes, and opened the fridge for a glass of water.

  What should I cook for dinner? Matt should arrive any minute now.

  I opened the fridge again to return the pitcher and started rummaging in the crisper. My hand hovered at the carrot. That was when I realized there was no point in making dinner. Matt wouldn't be coming home because he didn't know my new address. I haven't talked to him in three months. Not since I fled that night when everything shot to hell...

  I took my keys from my bag and inserted it in the keyhole. But I was surprised to find that the doorknob wasn't locked. I twisted the knob and what unfolded in front of me was every woman's worst nightmare. My mind must've short circuited because I couldn't understand what my eyes were seeing.

  Matt was on the couch but he wasn't alone. In his arms was a petite and slender woman with long blond hair, and they were lip-locking like teenagers with raging hormones. They were so into it that they didn't notice me at first. I must be pretty shocked because I was rooted on the spot, stupidly watching my boyfriend as his hands groped the woman's ass.

  Women like to imagine what their reaction would be when they catch their boyfriend cheating on them— not that they don't have complete trust in them. But they rehearse in their mind just in case. But reality had a way of smacking you from your blind spot, catching you completely off-guard. And this situation was the perfect example.

  Matt must’ve sensed my presence because when his eyes turned to the direction of the doorway he quickly shoved her away from his body like she suddenly caught fire. I could see how panic and horror morphed his gorgeous face, the face I loved so much. Matt opened his mouth to speak but no words came. He closed it again. His face was as white as a sheet. I noticed with detached amusement that he looked like a goldfish— a pale goldfish.

  "Georgie... y-you're here?" Out of all the things he could say, he chose that. If I weren't so shocked right now I would've laughed at how comical his reaction was.

  The woman on the couch stared at me with equal panic in her eyes. The bitch was Carmella Coen, Matt's colleague. I've met her before, during one of those cocktail parties in Matt's office. I never suspected that she and Matt were sneaking behind my back. I must've looked like a fool to them, having no idea that my boyfriend was cheating on me with this bimbo.

  Anger surged in me at that thought, finally thawing the numbness in my mind. The situation didn't sink in to me until that moment. The grocery bags in my hand landed on the floor, the tomatoes and apples rolling out of the bag.

  "I can explain," Matt stated, his voice too high and panicky. Carmella stood up from the seat and for a second I thought she was going to charge into me. I took a step back. But she remained standing, just behind Matt.

  "Georgie—"

  Her voice cut through the haze of pain, anger and shock. How dare this woman call me by my nickname like we were friends? She fucking stole my boyfriend.

  My vision turned red and I grabbed the first thing I could get my hands on— a tomato— and I hurled it at her. It hit her square in the face, bursting in red juice and seeds. It wasn't satisfying enough.

  "You bitch! Don't fucking call me 'Georgie' like we're goddamn friends," I shrieked. I made a move to grab another produce, this time an apple. But Matt quickly stopped me, his hands gripping my arms to prevent me from ruining Carmella's nose job.

  "Don't you touch me, you son of a bitch. Don't you fucking touch me," I spat, my voice shrill with the adrenaline coursing through my veins. I sounded like a madwoman— which I was.

  "Okay, okay." He let go of my arms and raised his hands in a non-threatening gesture. "Just please calm down."

  "Calm down?" I shouted in disbelief. "How the fuck can I calm down?"

  "It's not like what you think." Matt's voice shifted from panicky to soothing, trying to coax me to not be homicidal.

  "I'm not a five-year-old, Matt. I know what I saw."

  "Let's talk about this." He was using his Wall-Street-stock-broker steady and sensible voice to pacify the situation.

  "There's nothing to talk about, asshole!" I hurled the apple in his direction but he quickly ducked, and it hit the lampshade instead. It landed on the floor with a crash.

  I ran into my room Matt and I shared. I grabbed a duffel bag in the closet and stuffed it with the first articles of clothing I could grab. I got out of the apartment in a haste before I could damage more stuff or worse, set it on fire while the two of them trapped inside. I choked back the tears and descended the stairs as fast as my feet would allow. The winter wind prickled my face. I didn't know what to do or where to go. But there was one thing I knew for sure: there was no way I was going back in there tonight.

  I scrolled through my phone's contacts, searching for someone to call. But my contacts were also Matt's friends. Except for my team at Fielding-Morris. With trembling fingers, I dialed Mariz and prayed that she would pick up.

  "Hey, Georgie! How's the anniversary celebration going?" Her voice was cheery, having no idea what had just transpired.

  "Mariz," I said in a shaky voice. It was the only word I could muster before the tears fell freely from my eyes.

  "Honey, what's wrong? Are you okay?"

  I ignored her question and asked one of mine. "Where are you?"

  "At home. I just arrived from the office."

  "Can I come over?" I squeaked.

  "Yes, yes of course."

  I padded to my room, all thoughts of food and dinner vanished. I laid my tired and sore body on the mattress, my eyes focused on the blindingly bright bulb on the ceiling. Hot, prickling tears rolled from the corner of my eyes to my ears. I stared at the light bulb until my eyes hurt. I blinked hard, dark spots danced around my vision.

  I grabbed a pillow, covered my face with it and let out a muffled shout. I hated this. I hated the way I felt— used, shamed, betrayed.

  Matt and I had known each other for seven years, had been together for five, lived together for three years. He didn't just become my boyfriend but he also became a permanent fixture in my life. For a long time he had been there for me. We went through and got out of a lot of shit in college. When his parents got divorced I was there for him. He sat through the sappy chick flicks that I loved to watch. He got me. I got him. We were a team.

  So what did go wrong? Why did he choose Carmella over me? Was it something I did? How did we get here? Wasn't I good enough? Was seven years of friendship and love that easy to throw away? My mind was filled with questions I had no answers to.

  I'd go insane if I kept thinking of the past. I couldn't change it now. There was no point in mourning the loss of something y
ou couldn't bring back anymore. But a part of me didn't want to let go. It was easier to dwell on the what ifs than to move forward.

  My stomach grumbled. I should eat. I haven't had anything since breakfast this morning but the one ounce of energy left from working myself off the whole day was spent sobbing and thinking about Matt. I was too exhausted to deal with the world. Sleep sounded good, it would take me away from this plight and shroud me with darkness. It would make me forget, even just for a moment.

  CHAPTER TWO

  Atkins

  Lukas's office looked spacious and modern. The glass windows let in the sun's light, making the room look bright and cheery. All sorts of papers and motivational posters were tacked to the wall. One poster said “COFFEE IS YOUR BEST FRIEND. SLEEP IS THE ENEMY”. A framed picture was perched on his desk, Lukas was in the picture, together with a guy I didn't know. They had their arms around each other and they were smiling.

  "Oh, that," he said, noticing that I was eying the photo. "That's my boyfriend," he said matter-of-factly, answering my unspoken question. He closed my portfolio and handed it back to me.

  I raised an eyebrow and ask, "You got a new one? What happened to Dan?"

  "I don't want to talk about him, Atkins." His voice was clipped and there was a finality to it. I decided not to push it. My cousin's dating life wasn't my business. "Why are you even here anyway?"

  "I'm applying for a job. Didn't you mention you're looking for a software developer?"

  "But I didn't think you're actually going to sign up for the job! I don't do nepotism."

  Since when did Lukas become a goody-goody? I had a feeling he was just pissing me off. He was always so cutthroat.

  "I'm good at this and you know it. My portfolio is proof."

  Lukas leaned back in his chair and heaved a sigh. He knew I was right and he hated to admit it.

  "Fine, you're in," he conceded. "But just because you're my cousin doesn't mean you can slack off. Everyone around here works hard and I expect nothing less from you."

  "I know. So, when can I start?"

  "How about I introduce you to the team now?"

  That was quick.

  "Sounds fine to me."

  I stood up from my seat. We shook hands briefly before exiting his office.

  "Hey everyone," Lukas shouted, calling the attention of his team. "I have an announcement to make." All eyes and ears were on him. "You remember I was looking for a new software developer, right?"

  "What's wrong with Clyde?" A guy wearing a beanie and thick-rimmed glasses asked. Another guy, who I assumed was Clyde, gave him the finger. A girl in a short bob snickered and said, "Shut your mouth, Zang."

  I was starting to like this team.

  "As I was saying," Lukas continued, "We were looking for another software developer to keep up with the demand of the workload. Well, I'm happy to announce that we've found one— and a very good developer at that. This is Atkins Rosenfeld, everyone. And just because he's my cousin doesn't mean he can laze off and pass the work to you."

  "Please," I muttered under my breath.

  Zang walked up to me. "What's up, man?" We bumped fists and he clapped me on the back. "How're you doin'?"

  "Good, really good."

  "I'm Zang, by the way. And this tough cookie right here—" he gestured to the girl with the short bob, "—is Mariz. Stay away from her, she's a psycho."

  "Hey, I heard that!"

  Zang ignored her and continued introducing me to everyone. He pointed to Clyde and said, "That guy over there is Clyde." But Clyde was already back to doing whatever he was doing in his computer. "This girl right here is Georgie. She's the product designer. Basically, her job is to make our lives hell. No project goes out without her approval. Don't get on her bad side"

  The first thought that came into my mind when I laid eyes on Georgie was that she was beautiful. Not pretty or nice but beautiful.

  She only gave a small smile in my direction. Her eyes were puffy and red-rimmed like she had been crying.

  I wanted to say hi to her and maybe strike a nice little chat. I was approaching her when something snagged in my foot. It was a power cord and I accidentally unplugged it. Georgie let out a sharp gasp, her computer's monitor went dead.

  "What the fuck?" she blurted with annoyance in her voice. She was feisty. In that moment I decided that I liked her more. Girls shouldn't take shit from a guy.

  "I-I'm so sorry," I apologized, my hands pressed together in a prayer-like position, my head slightly bowing— the universal gesture for apology.

  "What happened?" Lukas asked no one in particular.

  "She was working on the Beam app when the computer suddenly went dead," Mariz answered. "It's your fault," she said to me.

  "I'm really sorry." Shit. Not one hour into my new job and I already made a teammate upset. I mentally smacked my own head.

  "I told you not to get on her bad side," Zang said but I ignored him.

  "Whatever," Georgie said, her arms crossed. "Now I'll have to start over, no thanks to you."

  Lukas showed me to my workstation, which was situated between Clyde and Zang. Our workspace was basically just one huge table. The computers were mounted on the table along with an assortment of pencils, drafting paper, empty soda bottles and binders. Zang's end of the table was the most chaotic while Georgie's was the most pristine, save for an empty cup of coffee. Unlike most offices, our workstation wasn't divided into cubicles, so when someone talked everyone could hear it. Lukas's rationale was an open workstation encouraged everyone to share their ideas, encouraged us to work as a team. And in a web and software design studio teamwork was the key to success.

  I quickly found out that Zang was a chronic talker while Clyde was the exact opposite. Lukas handed me a binder containing all the information about the project we were working on, the Beam app. I wasn't supposed to start until tomorrow but it was important that I get up to speed as soon as possible. The Beam app wasn't the only project our team was working on. It wasn't unusual to work with more than one project at a time. Some software required some sort of subsystem and we had to do that too.

  The day continued on with no new accidents, power interruption or otherwise. The team was silent for the most part, everyone was intent on their work. Lukas retreated to his office. He was talking to someone on the phone. My gaze turned to Georgie, she was intent on whatever she was doing on the computer. I felt like such a jerk for pissing her off, although technically I didn't mean what happened. I should go and say sorry to her one more time. It didn't hurt to lay it on thick.

  I slid my wheeled chair over to her side of the table, keeping extra caution not to trip on any more power cord.

  "Hey Georgie," I greeted her. "I'm so sorry for tripping up the power cord. It was all my fault."

  Georgie only glared in response. My eyes roved down her bow-shaped lips. They were so full and... kissable. Did she have a boyfriend?

  Focus, Atkins. Focus.

  I barely knew her, and it wasn't like I was attracted to her. Okay, maybe I was, a little. Just a teeny tiny bit.

  Her face was impassive when she looked at me. "Go away."

  "I'll make it up to you," I offered, flashing her my signature megawatt smile.

  "Go away," she repeated and returned her attention to her work.

  You have to choose your battles, there was no point fighting if you know you're not going to win. I returned to my seat.

  At promptly 5 PM everyone exited the building. We were done for the day. Lukas invited me to dinner and drinks with Zang and Clyde but I politely declined. I had something else planned for my evening.

  Georgie and Mariz were already walking away, their arms linked. I walked up to Georgie. "Hey," I called.

  "Go away," she said without a pause.

  Undeterred, I walked beside her. "I think we got off on the wrong foot, no pun intended. Maybe we should try this again? Hi, I'm Atkins Rosenfeld, the new software developer. I'm really sorry about that little inc
ident. If you’d like, I can help you with whatever you were working on with the app."

  Beside her, Mariz let out a giggle. "It's really cute how you pester Georgie. You're like a puppy."

  I frowned at the adjective she used to describe me. "A cute puppy?" I said indignantly.

  "I don't have time for this," Georgie announced, her voice peeved. She exhaled deeply, changing tactics. "Listen," her voice was less harsh. "It's okay. I've fixed it. I forgive you." She was eying me like you would a little child, imploring them to understand what you're saying. "So please stop hovering around me."

  "Okay." A grin formed on my lips. "Glad that's all ironed out. See you tomorrow." I raised my hand in a wave but she didn't wave back. Mariz wiggled her fingers and said, "Bye, Atkins."

  CHAPTER THREE

  Georgina

  I climbed into the passenger's seat of Mariz's car. My apartment was on the way to our firm so picking me up wasn't too much trouble for her.

  Getting a car would've been more convenient, not to mention more economical, than riding a taxi to go to work or asking a ride from a friend but I never had the need to have one because Matt always dropped me on his way to work.

  Matt.

  Remembering him made my heart ache again. It wasn't just the emotional ache either, it was almost like he was squeezing my heart. No, I wouldn't let the thought of him ruin my otherwise good day.

  "Penny for your thoughts? You're really quiet today," Mariz observed.

  "Just thinking about stuff, I guess," I answered vaguely.

  "And do these stuff go by the name of Matt?" She knew me too well.

  "Yeah," I replied, my voice small. I hated to admit it out loud, to admit it to her, that he still affected me. Even after three months.

  "Asshole's not worth your while."